Name: We Are Not Really Strangers
Creator: Koreen Odiney
Platform: Deck of customized cards with prompts
Target audience: Adults looking to get to know each other better. Can be played by 2 people or in groups
How vulnerable do you need to get in the game? How does it encourage players to interact and engage with each other?
**note: (I played a online version in quizlet so I wouldn’t have to purchase the game, so pictures are of quizlet flashcards)
We Are Not Really Strangers is one of the most effective and impressive getting to know you games out there. It masterfully crafts a gameplay experience that helps players build connections and promotes understanding through vulnerability. Depending of the level, the game requires deeper introspection and vulnerability but engages players in a way that is natural and comfortable. The following paragraphs will analyze the game design elements that encourage interaction and vulnerability.
The initial game mechanic that boosts interaction is the question and answer process. A person picks up a card and asks the other player or players a question. This dynamic of having to respond a question asked by someone else, instead of reading it yourself is simple but very effective, its boosts engagement. In level one (the level of perception), the most important mechanic is in the phrasing of the questions. By making all of the answers be about how players perceive the question asker (picture to the left), players have to be genuine and/or satirical. These questions force players to really observe the people they are playing with and convey these perceptions. It makes players feel seen and acknowledged and works to quickly bring down their barriers. The game rules suggest playing at least 15 cards (2 person game) or 2
cards per person (3-6 people) before continuing to round two, this mechanic ensures the desired effect of comfortability before the next level. In this level not much vulnerability is required.
As the game progresses to the second (connection; pictured on the right) and third (reflection) levels, the questions demand more introspection, asking players to reveal personal experiences,
feelings, and thoughts. Vulnerability in this game is not about sharing secrets per se, but about being open to discussing one’s genuine self, including fears, dreams, regrets, and joys. The design of these questions encourages players to step out of their comfort zones and share personal stories and opinions that they might typically keep private. This level of vulnerability can be profoundly impactful, creating a space where players feel seen and understood in ways that foster genuine connections. The wild cards in the game add a great dynamic since they break the flow of the game and force you to either write something down, or text someone important. This ensures any monotony will be broken.
The last two elements of game design that I want to highlight that really encourage interaction and engagement are the dig deeper card and the final card. The dig deeper card pushes a player to be more open and vulnerable but can only be used once so the player using it will ensure that they use it very tactfully. Having it only be playable once makes it a very valuable resource and one that will really deepen then bond and connection when one of the listeners is needing it. The final card is a cute and sentimental way to wrap up the game and make it more memorable.
Finally, the game often leads to players continuing their conversations outside the game, pondering the questions and discussions that arose during play. This extended engagement is a testament to the game’s effectiveness in fostering meaningful interactions that go beyond mere gameplay.
